You mean blizzard ice cream?!?!?!

For the past few days the weather reports have been saying that we are gonna have a massive snow storm tear through the area. 

I kept telling Clint that I did not believe it ... that it would die off ... and we might end up with a little "dust" of snow covering the ground when we woke up Wednesday morning.

I think I might be wrong on this one.

*shrugging shoulders*

Today while I was doing the dishes ... our weather radio started going off.

BEEP ...

BEEP ...

BEEP ...

THIS IS THE NATIONAL WEATHER REPORT.

*pause*

My FIRST thought is TAKE COVER!  A *bleeping* tornado is about to take my house and I will end up like Dorothy in the Wizard of Ozz.

We're off to see the wizard ...

THE NATIONAL WEATHER REPORT HAS A BLIZZARD WARNING ...

*pause*

I am still focused on the fact that a tornado is gonna blow me away and I do not have my ruby red slippers on ...to click together 3 times ... to get me back home!!! 

There's no place like home ...

There's no place like home ...

There's no place like home ...

I DO NOT deal well with tornados.

PERIOD!

Point blank!

No if's ... and's ... or but's about it!

The ONLY time that darn weather radio goes off ... is when a tornado is about to hit ... and I start to cry ... possibly curl up in the fetal postion ... and scream "I WANT MY MOMMY!"

FOR THE FOLLOWING AREAS ...




*pause*

I freeze instantly and try to remember where Clint told me to go and take cover in the house incase the tornado sirens ever went off and he was not here. 

All I can think of ... is that ... THERE IS NO F*CKING BASEMENT!!!!

I WANT MY MOMMY!!

DOUGLAS COUNTY

Suddenly everything starts to sound like Charlie Brown's teacher ...

WHAW ... WHAW ... WHAW ...

Did that say BLIZZARD?!?!?!

For Douglas County?!?!?!

This is Kansas for crying out loud.  When I think of blizzards ... I think of Alaska ... eskimos .... big furry coat ... living in iglos ... using a sled pulled by dogs to get around. 

NOT. KANSAS.

NOPE!

Tornados ... sure!!!

Blizzards ... uhhh ... no!!!

Anyways ... after I realize that I am not gonna die in the next 5 seconds due to some random tornado in January ... I go and tell the kids that we are in a blizzard warning and their new snow boots and new snow suits that we spent $155 on will STILL get some use out of them.

WOOT!  WOOOT!

Money well spent.

(I said that with TOTAL scarcasm incase you were wondering)

Harleigh asked me what a warning was ...

Eythen asked me if I was talking about a blizard from Dairy Queen ... because if so ... he wanted an Oreo Blizzard.

Breeanna asked if they will cancel school ... and if so ... can they stay up late.

Will they cancel school?!?!?!  That is a REALLY good question my adorable little 9 year old!!! 

The "blizzard" is suspose to start at 7 am. 

That is well after I have my kids up.  Shoot ... we have already had breakfast by 7 am would be playing our morning game of Uno by that time. 

By noon it is suspose to be "white out conditions".  I know as a parent ... I sure the heck do not wanna be out driving in that mess at 3:00 in the afternoon to pick the kids up from school.

I wonder if they will cancel school "because the weather man PROMISED a blizzard was coming?!?!?

Hmmmm?!?!?!?

I can do one of two things ...

1.  I can send their little hiney's to bed at their normal time because this Mommy needs "some quiet time" and hope the school calls by 5:30 am and cancels school.

or ...

2.  I could let them stay up late and hope that they cancel school tomorrow.   BUT ... that would be my luck that school would not be canceled ... and I would still have to get my kids up early in the morning. 

And they would be tired ...

And cranky ...

At school ... 

What if they had a test ... and was so tired ... they failed?!?!?! 

What is they fell asleep at school because I let them stay up late in hopes that there was a snow day?!?!?! 

What if they were so cranky they got sent to the principle's office?!?!?!  Then the principle would ask why were they so tired and cranky towards everyone at school ... and they would reply with "Mommy let me stay up really late last night."

And I would be up for Mommy of the Year Award ... AGAIN!

I am certain to win that darn award sooner or later with my amazing parenting skills.

I think I will go with option #1 ...

Except ...

I think I will add a glass of wine to the scenerio.

If you do not hear from us by Thursday ... send in the reinforcements to come and shovel us out ... and please bring wine.  I might need some more bottles by that point in time.

I just read an article ...

... about a lady who makes ice cubes out of left over wine.

I am confused ... what's left over wine?!?!?

smarty pants ...

I asked Eythen this evening if he learned anything new today at school today ... and without blinking an eye ... he replied with ... "NOPE! I already knew it all."

*sigh* ...

Eythen: Great news Mommy! I get to go to my first sleepover! Brylee invited me over.

Me: Who is Brylee?

Eythen: She is in my class.

Me: SHE?!?!? You are not spending the night at a girls house!!!

*60 second pause*

Eythen: I have a great idea Mommy! I will take my tent and sleep in it at her house. Then it is like I am not even there.

*sigh*

A heavy heart for the Jayhawk community ...

I informed Clint the other night ... that I think that we should adopt Thomas Robinson and his little sister. He suggested we send a donation to the scholarship fund that is set up for his younger sister instead. I still think that adopting the 19 year old, 6' 9", KU basketball player and his little sister is the way to go.

*moment of silence for the sudden death of Thomas Robinson's mother, Lisa Robinson, at the young age of 37*

*moment of silence for the death of Thomas Robinson's grandparents whom both passed on two different days 3 weeks prior of his Mom's death*

I hate Mondays ...

Monday's are so darn busy for us.  Well ... let me rephrase that ... Monday's are so darn busy for Harleigh.  It just so happens ... that the 3 activities that she is involved in at the moment ... ALL fall on Monday. 

Every. Single. One. Of. Them.  *ugh*

So once school is let out ... I am running around ... better yet ... driving around ... like a chicken with my head cut off. 

We have to fly drive carefully back to the house so Harleigh can get changed into her leotard for gymnastics ... which means she leaves a trail of clothing along the way for Mommy to pick up once the night is over. 

All 3 kids unload their bookbags at lighting speed ... and suddenly I have a tornado of papers coming at me at once ...

Some need signed ...

Some need complemented on a job well done ...

Some need to be hung on the frig for the world to admire ...

Some need to go in the trash when Eythen is not looking because he is CERTAIN I need to save every single thing that he brings home ...

Some things are for me to read ...

Somethings are art projects sent home for one of the kids to make and then get sent back to school.  AKA:  Mommy needs to make a mental note to remember that she has to go to Hobby Lobby to buy the supplies to make the newest craft project.

Somethings need completed by the next day for school.  AKA:  Homework

I have all of this coming at me ... thrown at me ... tossed at me ... handed ever so nicely to me ...

All the while ...

Someone is screaming "Mommy!" ...

Someone else is screaming "I am hungry." ...

Someone else is screaming "Momma" ...

Someone else is screaming "Mom where is my blue leotard that I TOLD YOU I wanted to wear?" ...

Someone else is screaming "I am hungry." ...

Someone else is screaming "Do I HAVE to go and sit and watch Harleigh?" ...

Someone else is screaming "I am hungry." ...

All of this MUST happen in 8 minutes or less ... or we will miss gymnastics.  And let me tell you ... for the price that we pay for her little round hiney to flip off that balance beam and for the blood to rush to my head every single time she does it ... we will be at gymnastics hell or high water every single session!!!

So ... 10 minutes later ... Eythen is insisting that he DOES NOT have to go to the bathroom ... even though I INSISTED that he try JUST IN CASE he ends up having to go while Harleigh is in gymnastics.

NOPE!  He is CERTAIN he DOES NOT have to go.

Please remember this for future use ...

11 minutes later ...

Breeanna has her homework in hand ... Eythen has his homework in hand ... and Harleigh has her very large cookie and pop in hand (hey ... on days like today ... I am in NO MOOD to push the "let's eat something healthy" issue.  Let's just get OUT the door!!!) ... we load up ... and are on the road 3 minutes behind schedule.

3 minutes is much better than 8 minutes behind like the week prior.

While we are on our way to Pinnacle Gymnastics ... Breeanna normally does her homework in the car and I never hear a peep out of her.  Harleigh is normally shoveling in her "nutrition" to last her through gymnastics ... then she shovels in more "nutrition" to last her through basketball practice ... then she shovels in even more "nutrition" to last her through hip hop dance class.  Eythen normally has reading that he has to do on Monday nights ... so I have him read his books to me in the car once we park and Harleigh goes into the her gymnastics building. 

But ... today ... Eythen asked if he could read to me while I was driving.

Sure ... go for it ... if he did not know the word ... Breeanna was 6 inches from him and could help him sound it out.  Yeah ... yeah ... yeah ... Most Hands On Parent award goes to ... ME!!!!

So as I am darting in out of of traffice driving ever so carefully trying to make up for the 3 minutes we lost trying to get out the door I hear my son reading his book.

"This is my hat."

"This is my coat."

"This is my mitten."

OH!  He must be reading a book about winter clothing.  How cute!

"This is my boot."

"This is so boring."

What did he just say?!?!?

"This is my sweater."

OH!!!  I must have heard him wrong!!!

"This book is to easy."

HUH?!?!?!  I am pretty sure I heard him right this time.

"This book is for babies."

"This is my sock."

"This is my scarf."

I am gonna have to look at this book once we get to the gymnastics building.

"This is REALLY boring."

So I glance in the rear view mirror and ask him "Eythen ... are you SURE that is how the book goes?!?!?"

I get a shit eatin grin from the back seat ... and Breeanna shaking her head back and forth while mouthing the words "NO!" to me.

10 minutes later we arrive ... Harleigh flies out of the car and takes off running into the building.

And what words do I hear come out of my son's mouth???

"I have to go to the bathroom."

I hate Mondays.  *sigh*

Snow Day?!?!?!

The moment my kids got off the bus ... they informed me that they were gonna be wearing there pajama's wrong side out ... in hopes of tomorrow being a snow day.

Well ... let me change that ...

Harleigh and Eythen were on the "wearing their pajama's wrong side out" ban-wagon.

Breeanna looked at me and said "There is NO WAY there is gonna be school tomorrow, Mom.  It is a blizzard outside.  Seriously."

So the second Harleigh and Eythen walked in the door ... the rushed up the stairs ... and turned their pajama's wrong side out ... and set out on a mission of declaring tomorrow as a snow day.

Harleigh decided to add the pets in the mission of turning tomorrow into a snow day.
Incase you can not tell ... Harleigh put Lucy's coat on wrong side out.
Yes ... Lucy has a coat.
But shouldn't we be focused on the factor that my daughter is a nut case and
turning the pets clothing wrong side out. 
NOT the factor that our dog has a coat.
Yeah ... that is what I thought.

Eythen not only turned his wrong side out ...
he decided to put his pajamas on backwards ...
in hopes that it would be that little extra "nudge".

Yes ... Harleigh even cornered poor IzzaBell and turned her kitty shirt wrong side out.
Again ... let's not focus on the fact that our cat has a shirt.
Let's focus on the fact that my daughter is a nut case ...
and decided that the cat would be the determining factor
with the snow day Gods.
Yes ... our cat has a shirt.  *sigh*

IzzaBell was NOT thrilled to be apart of the whole
"Let's make a snow day happen"
thing that Harleigh and Eythen had going on.
I am pretty sure she is happier when the children are at school ...
and she is not chased by a crazy 6 year old.
Just. A. Guess.

Breeanna was about as thrilled as the cat.



Oh yeah ... the school already called ...
SNOW DAY TOMORROW!!!

Holy blizzard Batman!!!  Who shook the snow globe so many times?!?!?! 

It started snowing at 1:00 this afternoon ... and has not stopped once.

I love snow!!!

One of "those" nights ...

Have you ever had one of "those" nights after you crawl into bed???

Eh-hemmm

*clearning throat*

No ... I do not mean "those" nights.

Get your mind out of the gutter.

Gee Wiz people!!!

I mean the kind of nights that you can NOT sleep.

No. Matter. What. 

You have 50 millions things running through your head ... and the harder you try to clear your head ... the more of a cluster f*** it becomes.

UGH!!!  I hate those kind of nights.

*yawn*

Yep ... I had one of "those" nights last night.

What makes it worse ... was that I was SO darn tired when Clint and I finally crawled into bed.  I could hardly wait for my head to hit the pillow. 

I. Was. Exhausted.

Then ... just when I was about to fall asleep ... WHAM ...

Clint starts to snore ...

And my brain starts to go in circles ...

Did I lock the door?

Yeah ... I did.

I think.

*get up to make sure the doors are locked*

Is the SUV payment due this week?

Oh yeah ... my SUV needs gas.

I wonder if gas will go up overnight?

*sigh*

Who is the one that decides this anyways?

Shoot!  Eythen has show-n-tell tomorrow.

I can't forget that ... again.

*go downstairs to write myself a note about show-n-tell*

What was that noise?

There is it again.

Maybe I should wake up Clint?!?!?

*insert Clint snoring here*

Did I set my alarm clock?

Maybe I should double check to make sure it is still set for the correct time to go off.

Jill ... really?!?!?  You NEVER change the time ... so why wouldn't it be set for the SAME time ... just like EVERY other day?!?!?

*hitting alarm clock button to be sure it is set for the correct time*

Is that the dog I hear taking a bath at the foot of our bed?!?!?

I need to make an appointment for the dog to get groomed.

I really should have shaved my legs before I went to bed.

I need to print off the coupon from CVS tomorrow.

Wait!  I can't print it off until I get more ink the in the printer.

*get up to write myself a reminder about printer ink*

Was that one of the kids?!?!

Or was that someone trying to break into the house?!?!?

I did lock the doors ... right?!?!?

Hateing the fact that I wanna go and check to make sure that the doors are locked ... even thought I KNOW they are.

*reach for phone to be sure it is working just in case someone is trying to break in*

Where is my cellphone?!?!

If someone is trying to break in ... and they cut our land line ... I will need my cellphone.

SH*T!!!  I think I left it in my SUV.

Great!

We are all gonna die!

*hiding underneath the covers*

MAN Clint snores loud!

*dog gets done taking her bath at the foot of our bed and decides to jump up on the bed and scare the pee out of me*

*scoot closer to Clint for protection*

Man that snore is SO annoying!

Suddenly I realize that I am the closest to the door and will get killed first if someone breaks into our house.

Debate about waking Clint up and asking him to switch sides with me.

See red numbers out of the corner of my eye ... and realizing that the alarm clock says 12:10.

If I fall asleep NOW ... I will get 5 and 1/2 hours of sleep.

*Clint rolls over and takes half of the blankets with him*

*dog decided that sleeping up by my head is the most comfortable place for her*

Did I just see something in the bathroom?

Was that a freaking ghost?!?!

Could this house have spirits in it?!?!?

I wonder if they watch Clint and I ... uhhh ... ummm ... "cuddle in bed".

Ewww!!!  We have perveted ghost in our house!!!

HUSH THOUGHTS ... LET ME SLEEP!!!

Can he NOT snore for ONE stinking night?!?!?

*slightly nudge husband*

There ... he stopped.

NOW I can go to sleep.

AWWW MAN!!!  I am down to only 5 hours of sleep if I fall asleep RIGHT NOW!!

*Clint starts to snore instantly ... again*

REALLY?!?!?

For crying out loud!!!

*sighing REALLY loud in hopes it wakes Clint up*

*elbow Clint's side in hopes of stopping the earth shaking noise coming from his body*

*move my foot "swiftly" at Clint's body in hopes of SHUTTING HIM UP*

*having vision of putting pillow over Clint's face*

Was that a shadow I saw???

CRAP!!!  Either the ghost is haunting me ... or someone broke in ...

Oh wait ... it is just Eythen standing at the foot of the bed ... staring at the wall.

WHAT THE?!?!?

Me:  Eythen!  What are you doing?

Eythen:  Mrs. Sweany told me to stand in line and wait my turn.

*confused look on face*

*noticing I only have 4 1/2 more hours till the BLEEPING alarm goes off*

Me:  Eythen ... you are sleep walking ... go back to bed.

Eythen:  Can I have some strawberries?

*insert Clint snoring*

Me:  Eythen ... go back to bed!

*escorting Eythen back to bed*

*tucking Eythen back into bed*

*kissing Eythen on the forehead*

*walking back to my bedroom when suddenly the cat decided it would be hilarious to leap out of no where and attack my feet*

It is possible that I just peed my pants a little from thinking that a ghost or robber was attacking me ... then suddenly realizing it was the freaking cat.

I am certain that freaking cat is posed or something.

*HUGE red numbers flashing on the alarm clock*

*Clint snoring so loud that China thinks their tornado sirens are going off*

*cat giving me a stare down*

*dog laying sideways on my half of the bed*

Ehhh ... sleep is over rated anyways.

Then again ... if I fall asleep NOW ... I will get 4 hours of sleep.

Brrr ...

This cold weather is amazing ... if you are a freaking eskimo.

Due to the factor ...

... that gas is $3.15 in Eudora ... and filling up my SUV cost well over $70 ... I am thinking that having the kids drive their 4 wheelers and mopeds to and from places ... is starting to sound like a brillant idea.

If you see them tootin down the road ... you know that I decided to spend Clint's hard earned money on something other than gas.

Funny how you think your house is spotless ... until you walk into your children's rooms.

Then. You. Cry.

Brrrr ...

The is Eskimo type of weather!!!

Jill ... It's a huge game!!!

One thing that you MUST know about me before you read any further into this blog post ...

I could care less about football. 

Point. Blank.

Me + Football = *yawn*

I. Could. Care. Less.

*yawn*

It is four LONG hours ...

*yawn*

It is full of guys running at full speed right towards another guy ... in hopes of knocking the crap out of them. 

*yawn*

I don't get it. 

What is the big deal?

*shrugging shoulders*

*yawn*

Sorry Clint ... I can hear him gasping in shock after he just read that last statement.

From Labor Day weekend till Super Bowl Sunday ... my husbands eats, breathes and uses beer in place of his 5 major food groups. 

During football season ... the beer is ALWAYS stocked full in the frig.  We can not have a lick of food in the house and desperately need to go to the grocery store ... but you can ALWAYS count on there being Miller Lite in the frig.

ALWAYS.

NO. MATTER. WHAT.

PROMISE.

So ... I am sure you can understand why the Monday after Super Bowl Sunday ... is one of my favorite days of the year. 

I truely think I DESERVE some beautiful hot pink roses hand delivered to me as my husband walks in the door on the Monday after Super Bowl Sunday ... as a "Job Well Done" for surviving another year of football.

Hint Hint Clint!

Clint ... did you just make a mental note about that?!?!?

Even though the "suggestion" is RIGHT THERE in black and white ... 

You can rest assure ... that I will not receive hot pink roses on the Monday after Super Bowl Sunday.

Not. A. Single. One.

EVEN THOUGH my husband reads my blog daily to be sure I did not share something totally embarrassing about him ... 

He will NOT "think" about stopping by one of the ZILLION flower stores that he passes by EVERY SINGLE DAY on his way home ... that have HUGE flashing NEON signs that say "Bouquet of roses for $9.00". 

Nope. 

It will not cross his mind. 

Not. At. All.

*sigh*

Back to football.

*yawn*

So ... every single time Clint informs me that he is watching football and I pout just slightly ... he informs me that "It is a HUGE game". 

It does not matter if it is the first game of the year. 

It does not matter if they have lost 19 games in a row. 

It does not matter if it is his least favorite team. 

It does not matter if he is so tired he can hardly keep his eyes open. 

It does not matter if the sound broke on the tv and you can not hear a single thing they are saying. 

It does not matter if the game is not televised and he has to listen to it on the radio. 

I will hear the samething ... EACH and EVERY time ... "Jill!  It is a HUGE game."

So ... I gave up years ago and stopped complaining.

Well ... ok ... I gave up a few years ago and stopped complaining.

Alright ... I gave up last year and stopped complaining.

*sigh*

Fine ... I still whine every now and then and get slightly annoyed when he has watched football ALL FREAKING DAY LONG.

BUT ... the end is FINALLY insight for me this football season. 

Super Bowl Sunday is quickly approaching!!! 

I really have no idea when Super Bowl Sunday is ... but I know it is normally towards the end of January.

AND ... the ONLY reason I know that ... is because my husband proposed to me ON Super Bowl Sunday ... 11 years ago.  Oh yes!  He got down on one knee ... with a house full of friends ... and proposed to me before the game began on Super Bowl Sunday.

I. Hate. Football.

*yawn*

I DO know that "Today is a HUGE game" because the Bears play ... which is Clint's favorite team. 

I also know ... that if they loose ... Clint will be in a REALLY bad mood.

AND ... I also know ... that I am praying that they win ... so Clint is in a really good mood ... because there are a few things I need taken care of around the house ... and I know I am more likely to "convince" him to help me if the Bears win.

GO BEARS!!!

P.S.  Harleigh and I were comfy in our pajama pants ... cuddled in my bed ... watching cartoons ...while these crazy football freaks were watching the Bears play football.

Yummy Yummy Yummy ...

Clint went with a friend to watch a live band. 

Breeanna is at a slumber party. 

Harleigh and Eythen are sleeping in a tent in Eythen's room. 

And me?!?!? 

I am enjoying an over sized-well deserved-taste oh so good glass of wine.

Oh ... who am I kidding ... it has been numerous glasses ... but who's counting?!?!?

Is that my skin burning off???

Pushed my seat heater button for the first time ever in my Yukon ... and I think I might have possibly of burnt my bum and legs.

Note to self ... No need to turn the heater on for the seats ... 10 minutes before departure ... unless you like to sit in lava.

I am seriously ...

... gonna have a heart attack before March Madness comes this year.

Clint and I are gonna have to watch the game for now on in seperate rooms ... do to the fact that we both scream at the TV ... and possibly throw a thing or two.

From the mouth of my 8 year old this evening ...

Don't these brown colored KU boys realize that we are counting on them?!?!?

Gym time ...

I would just like to fill you in on how my morning at the gym went ...

*  pull up to gym and stare at the gym door

*  debate about turning around and coming home because it is so cold outside

*  do not wanna have to tell Clint that I did not go because it was to cold outside, because he would call me a "wuss" as he walked out the door heading to the gym this evening

*  whimper a little bit as the cold air hits me the second I open up my Yukon doors

*  think to myself that being called a "wuss" is not a bad thing

*  open up gym doors and drag myself inside

*  immediately see a cute little girl in a sports bra and booty shorts laying on the floor working out her extremely flat-never had a baby in her tummy before-not a single stretch mark in sight-tan as can be in the dead of winter abs

*  call her a bitch under my breath

*  walk past skinny little bitch laying on floor and secretly wanna kick her

*  get on ellipitical machine

*  nearly fall off ellipitical machine while trying to put ear phones on

*  looking around to make sure skinny little bitch ... who is now doing lunges across the floor did not see me nearly take a nose dive off the ellipitical machine

*  working up a sweat

*  certain I have been on ellipitical for at least 15 minutes

*  nope ... a minute and a half

*  fuck

*  debate with myself if 2 minutes is a good warm up

*  skinny little bitch is still doing lunges across the floor

*  pretty sure I am about to have a heart attack if I do not get off the ellipitical machine

*  legs feel like jello

*  debate on sticking foot out to "accidentally" trip skinny little bitch in her sprots bra and booty shorts who is now jump roping

*  must do leg workout but not sure if my limp legs can even comprehend what they are suspose to do

*  owie

*  oh shit that hurts

*  anyone except skinny bitch catch me if I fall ... my legs are noodles

*  skinny little bitch leaves just in time for me to be able to do my lunges across the gym

*  my lunges do not look nearly as pretty as hers did

*  debate with myself on if my butt looks big in the sweatpants I have on as I watch myself in the mirror doing lunges

*  yep ... my butt looks big

*  what was that noise???

*  oh crap!!!  my stomch is growling

*  not a good time for my body to be making noises

*  good thing skinny little bitch is no longer here to hear my bodily noises

*  start to think about what I am gonna have to lunch as I go across the floor-with my legs feeling like jello-trying to do lunges-with my big butt following me

*  a cheeseburger sure does sound good

*  great ... now I am thirsty

*  i wonder if there is a pop machine around here

*  nope ... just a stupid germy water fountain

*  fuck

*  cardio done ... legs done ... now onto the abs

*  young studdly guy enters gym

*  young studdly guy thinks everyone is checking him out

*  young studdly guy who thinks he is the bomb is already annoying me

*  young studdly guy lifting weights over by the area I need to be at to do my ab workout

*  fuck

*  standing in the middle of the gym like a lost little girl because I do not wanna take my big butt in sweatpants over to the same area as young studdly guy ... and his young studdly friend who just joined him

*  pretending like I am stretching in hopes they leave the area

*  secretly hoping they drop the dumbbell on their toe as they admire themselves in the mirror as they do their arm workout

*  pretty sure I just threw up in my mouth a little bit

*  screw this ... I will just take my sweatpant wearing-3 baby havin-junk in the trunk behind-no makeup on-oversized sweatshirt-really wanting a Dr. Pepper-home and do my ab work out infront of the cat and dog

*  begin to wonder if the cat and dog secretly laugh at me

*  quickly saying a prayer that I do not fall ... due to my jello legs ... as I walk across the gym floor

*  debate on which gym I would switch to if I did fall face first on the gym floor

*  whimper slightly as the cold air hits me once I open the gym doors

*  curl up around my steering wheel while my back hurts from shaking so hard because my Yukon is freezing cold

Note to self:  Come to the gym when I am the only one there.  Perhaps 1 a.m. is a good time?!?!?



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Hear that???

Shhhh ...

Listen cafefully ...

Silence!!! 

AWWWW!!! 

The kids are back in school today. 

No snow day today.

Except ... there is one slight problem with them not being home.

Who is gonna play Just Dance on the Wii with me?!?!? 

I do not have 3 little bodies dancing their hearts out trying to beat their Mommy anymore. 

FYI ... I bring my "A game" when it comes to the dance moves. 

Oh yes!!! 

I am that good!!!

Today is ...

... definately a hot chocolate sippin-fuzzy sock wearin-sittin in front of the fireplace-snuggled under a fluffy blanket-stayin in your flannel pajama pants-kind of day.

10 degrees is just to darn cold for me.

Dear Eudora Community:

I want to extend my sincere apology to all of you ... for all of the screaming coming from our house between 3:00 & 5:00 Sunday afternoon.

The KU basketball game nearly caused Clint and I to have a heart attack.

I might have possibly ... even thrown the remote at one point in time ... but that just depends on who you ask.

So please ignore the future hootin' and hollarin' that will be seeping through the Moore household walls on game days.

Love: The loud house on the cul-de-sac

P.S.  The noise level might possibly get worse come Madness time ... fair warning.

Rock Chalk!!!

Thanks ...

Clint and I have the BEST neighbors EVER!!!

Chuck and Darren shoveled our driveway and sidewalk!!!

Hey boys ... do you think we could just tell Clint that I shoveled it though ... when he gets home?!?!?

He might possibly believe it?!?!?!

Doubtful ...

But it is worth a shot?!?!?

Personal trainer vs. the wife ...

Clint and I decided to make major changes in our lives when the clock struck midnight ... and we entered 2011.  We have had a rough 2 years.  And I do not mean with our marriage ... shit heck ... that is the one thing that is rock solid in our lives.

*knock on wood*

We did alot of praying ... sole searching ... and debating back and forth on what we were gonna do to make 2011 "our year".

We set alot of "goals" ... and set some of them really high ... but others are just a few inches out of our reach.

And ... some are really personal ... so I will not be sharing them with any of you.

You can breath now Clint ... 

I just suddenly had a vision of Clint holding his breath as he was reading this blog wondering how much in detail I was gonna go with our "goals".

Clint was turning blue in my vision.

*giggle*

One of our "goals" is to no longer be the "fluffy couple" and loose weight by eating better and actually using the gym membership that we have.  So far ... we have stuck to it. 

Unfortunately ... I can not tell you how much weight we have lost ... because we do not own a scale.

*note to self ... buy a scale*

So ... we have been watching what we eat ... and thinking of checking out the Sensa Weight Loss system. 

Actually ... a better way to pharse it is that ... we have been watching the kids eat while we are licking our lips wishing we could eat that Little Debbie Snack Cake they are eating in front of us.

Couldn't they at least have enough respect for their starving Mom and Dad ... and hide in the closet and eat the darn thing.

Geeze.

No respect I tell ya.

No respect.

We have also been hitting the gym every day.  I go in the morning after I take the kids to school ... and Clint goes in the evening after he gets home from work.

Last week ... Clint came home from the gym and informed me that he signed up to have the Personal Trainer train him.

Let me stop you right there and give you a little background information about myself.  I went to college and majored in Health Promotion and Recreation ... with an emphasis in Personal Training.

You see where I am going with this ... right?!?!?!

Oh ... and one more bit of information that will help towards the end of this blog post ... is knowing that my husand is a plumber.

Now ... back to the conversation that my husband managed to insult me in 2.5 seconds.

Me:  "You do remember what you wife majored in in college?!?!?!  Don't you?!?!?"

*flashing Clint a confused look*

Clint:  "Yeah".

*confused look starting to turn into an insulted look*

Me:  "Uhhhh"

Clint:  "Well.  It is just.  You know."

*yep ... insulted look going strong*

Me:  "You realize every single thing he tells you to do ... I could tell you the same exact thing."

Clint:  "O-K"

*forget the insulted look ... let's try "what the fuck heck look"*

Me:  "Sooooo ..."

Clint:  "Let the Personal Trainer train me ... and you stick with the nutritional part of our lives.  Ok?!?"

*not really sure if I have just been insulted or not*

Me:  "Sure ... but then don't be alarmed when you come home one day ... and there is a Roto Rooter plumbing van parked in the driveway ... and they are here fixing a clogged toilet."

Click here to vote for my blog!!!

CLOSED ...

Due to the severe weather conditions ...

There will be no blogging today.

Sorry.

But this Mommy has a snow ball fight to win ...

a snowman to make ...

some snow angels to perfect ...

with three kiddos that are UBBER excited about the snow that is falling outside.

Plus ... I am tired of hearing "Can we go out in the snow yet???"

I also have to help watch Clint shovel the driveway.


Please click on the link below and vote for my blog.  One little click ... is all it takes.

Look at what I got ...

I have my very own "button" for my blog!!!

Maribel from Candy Crayon Designs created the button for me.

I think it turned out great!!!

Thanks Maribel!!

My little Harleigh Bug ...

... scored her very first point at her basketball game today!!!

She was so proud of herself ... she started jumping up & down on the court while cheering for herself.

In the mean time ... her Mommy was possibly making a fool of herself in the bleachers ... jumping up & down while screaming "YEAH HARLEIGH" & "THAT"S MY GIRL" ... & I might have possibly said "KU GIRLS BASKETBALL TEAM ... HERE WE COME"!

Award Winner List ...

I can not believe I forgot to share this bit of information with all of you.

*drum roll please*

Heard On The Playground came across my blog and liked it so much ... that they asked me to submit some of my post to possibly be displayed on their website. 

Awesome huh?!?!?

If only it paid the bills it would be even more awesome!!!

(this is taken straight from Heard On The Playground website ...)

The mission of the site is simple, take all those moments that we see kids doing something hysterical (which in some cases can seem like every few minutes) and put them on a site for all of us to enjoy. Why should such great entertainment be limited to only a few. Kids are probably one of the best sources of humor and fun, so why not share the wealth.


Life is short, so join in on the fun, make a few posts and get a few laughs. Just remember, you‘ve heard it all here...well for the moment because kids never stop being funny and adults just can‘t help but laugh.

So ... stop on by Heard On The Playgound to read some funny happenings that people have experienced. 

AND ... I just got notified that a few of my post were selected to be on the AWARD WINNER list!!!

Here are the ones that they put on their AWARD WINNER LIST.

Recently my daughter, Harleigh, asked "Mommy, how do animals get the babies out of their tummies?  Not ready for the birds and the bees talk with my 7 year old, I lied "I am not sure. Let me try to find out and I will tell you later."  Refusing to give up, Harliegh says "Maybe Daddy knows?"  Digging my hole deeper I reply "I am pretty sure your Dad has no idea where babies come from."  So Harliegh says "I guess that makes sense since Mommies know everything and Daddies work hard."  Standing up for the male population's knowledge of reproduction, my son answers "Babies come out of their butt.   Where else could they come out?"

As I was tucking Eythen into bed this evening when he said to me: "Hey Mom. I think I am gonna feel yucky tomorrow.  So does that mean I can stay up tonight and watch cartoons since I'll be too sick to go to school tomorrow?"


This morning I was asked to go on a lunch date at the school cafeteria by my adorable little 5 year old.  As I walked into the cafeteria, my son greeted me with a smile and tried to make me feel welcomed by saying "Mommy, the school lunches are so good. I know you are going to like it better than the food you cook. I sure do." 

Since all of the post selected in the AWARD WINNER LIST were "Eythen-isms" ... I guess it just proves ... what Clint and I have thought all along. 

That Eythen is a nut case.

Heck ya ...

I am officially ranked at #57 in the Top Mommy Blogs!!!

How cool am I?!?!?!

You don't need to answer that one ...

No really ...

You don't need to answer that one ...

Uhhh ...

No ...

I ...

Well ...

Geeze ...



Remember ... vote for my blog!!!

What tequila bottle???

Houston we have a problem.

And it starts with a Te ...

and end with a Quila.

It seems that our garage smells like a dorm room the morning after a college girl went out drinking all night ... and scored alot of free drinks along the way. 

Just a guess ... on how that smells. 

NOT that I would know ANYTHING about how "the morning after a really drunk night" would smell. 

*halo shining brightly above my head*

It seems ... that a small bottle of tequila that was in our frig ... out in the garage ... fell to the floor ... and broke.

Yes people ... we have a frig in the garage that holds different varieties of liquor.

Don't judge me.

*halo shinging so brightly above my head you have to put your sunglasses on*

Back to the topic at hand ... I was in the process of mixing up a bucket of daquari mix this morning.

Yet again ... don't judge.

*remember the halo people*

I was not gonna drink it at 8:30 am.  Now ... it DID cross my mind.  BUT once you mix up the bucket of daquari mix ... it has to be frozen ... so drinking it was not an option anyways.

Clint and I had bought one of those bucket mixes for New Year's Eve ... but never once drank it.  Instead we went with Dr. Pepper and chocolate milk.  Oh yes ... that is how we roll!!! 

Anyways ... I decided to mix up the bucket for later this evening.  I went to go and put it in the freezer ... and then put the bottle of Rum in the frig. 

Well ... as I opened the frig door ... my OCD bitch slapped me in the face.  All I can see is a sea of bottles that are in no particular order.  Just sitting on the shelf in the frig ... with no rhyme or reason.

I think Clint secretly does this shit to annoy me.

None of the labels were facing the right way.  They were not arranged big to small.  And they were all over the shelf ... not in a nice organized line. 

See how this could be annoying!?!?!

So ... as I went to set the Rum bottle down on the shelf with one hand ... I might have reached for the champaign bottle a wee-bit to fast.  Because ... suddenly ... a small bottle of tequila was teter-tottering on the edge of the shelf.

SHIT!

How in the world can I grab that?

I have the Rum bottle in one hand ... and the champaign bottle that OBVIOUSLY should be in the back of the frig because it IS the tallest bottle in the other hand.

Need a third hand RIGHT ABOUT NOW!

SHIT!

*crash*

*tequilla smell rushing up my nose*

*possibly getting drunk just off the smell alone*

OH CRAP!

While attempting to pick up the glass ... I suddenly realize that the tequilla is dripping off my hands.  BOY OH BOY do I smell like a drunkin bum sitting on the side of the curb with a bottle wrapped in a paper bag.

Oh Crap!

I am having lunch with Harleigh in ONE HOUR!  How am I gonna get this smell off of me???  What if the 2nd graders surrounding me ... start sniffing ... then say ... "Harleigh your Mom's perfume smells weird".  What if the teachers walking past me ... smell the liquor on me ... shake their heads in disbelief ... and whisper "Did you smell that parent over there?  Poor kid!  Their Mom is a walking drunk."?!?!?!

So ... I quickly veto the idea of picking up the glass that fell on the floor ...

Clint can get it later ... it IS his fault after all.

Forget about picking up the liquid that quickly went from a puddle of tequila ... to a large stream aiming straight towards the garage doors.

Clint can get that, too. 

Maybe then he will stop stacking the green, pink, blue and red cups all together.  What kind of organization is that anyways?!?!?!  Same color gets stacked together.  It is just one of "those things" that you do in life.  Kind of like laughing when someone falls and trips ... you stack the same color of cups together.

DUH!

Back to the smell that is taking over my body ...

Will perfume cover up the smell?

Maybe if I wash my hands with this good smelling soap?

Hand sanitizer?  Don't mind if I do!!!

Well ... on the bright side ...the house at least smells good now.

Oh the "flip" side ... I smell like a cheep whore that just downed a bottle of tequila.

Great!

So ... lesson learned today ... don't start planning your "evening beverage" before noon.

*halo shining brightly above my head*

I think ...

... the nutritional facts on a box should just flat out tell me how long I am gonna have to be on the eliptical machine ... in order to burn off what I am about to eat.  I wonder who I need to talk to about getting this changed?!?!?!

What the f*** did he just say?!?!?!

Oh yes!  Another "What the F*** Did He Just Say?!?!?" Moment came about in my life ... AGAIN!  These moments seem to come quit often ... and more times than I would like to admit honestly.

Oh my little E-Man.

As we were leaving the school parking lot today ... I realized I needed to turn back around so I could chec on something.  As I circled the parking lot ... and pulled back into a slot to park ... this is what Eythen says ...

Eythen:  What are we doing?

Me:  I just need to check on something really fast.

Eythen:  *REALLY LOUD SIGH*

Me:  Really?  Was that necessary?  It is not like I am gonna take 4 hours or anything.

Eythen:  What?  I was just breathing.

Me:  Sounded more like an annoyed *sigh* to me.

Eythen:  No!  I was just breathing.  I did not get enough air at school today ... so I was just trying to catch up on my breathes.

Me:  *shaking head*